ABLE members wrote these limericks -- under some duress!
-- during the Mountain Lake Banquet of the 2005 ABLE annual meeting.
Mary and George are quite swell.
They care and are smart as well.
Plants now their hobby,
Wolf Creek was their lobby.
We happily ring their bell
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There was a woman from ABLE
Who did the very improbable.
As she tutored the provost,
She put biology labs foremost
Because if he does not follow them, he’ll be held liable. |
We went to visit the Hokies
Somewhere down south near the Smokies
We were going to ABLE,
But bought rounds for the table
And ended up in the pokey.
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We came to ABLE very caring.
That led us into Derring.
But attending the workshops
Made us hungry for porkchops,
And the room numbers left us all swearing. |
Our sense of direction was thrown
By the over prevalent Hokie stone.
Finding our rooms was a Payne,
And registration drove us insane
But our biology skills we did hone.
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Some limericks begin with Nantucket.
With four letter words that do muck it.
But Drewes with Artemia
Showed us something obsenia
By bringing us brine shrimp in a couplet. |
When Carol Budd was president
Virginia Tech was time well spent.
WE majored down in Derring Hall,
And minored in a singing squall.
I wonder when Bill’s agenda will be evident.
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While hanging out at Boudreaux’s,
A limerick we did compose.
Though having to rhyme with ABLE
Confounded our table
We decided to switch to prose. |
In a workshop by Drewes I did sit,
And he passed out another kit.
A solution he sought,
But it couldn’t be bought.
So he said, I know, I’ll just build it.
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We hope you enjoy our sad fable.
About our dinner with ABLE.
Twas our fate to be late,
But the company was great,
When they finally gave us our table. |
We came to ABLE to learn
About bugs, pigs, chickens, and worms.
But really, in truth,
It’s about alcohol and food,
and not maggot’s masses that squirm.
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We stand at our bench or table,
Learning by inquiry, if ABLE,
To boost labs we try,
At times do-or-die.
Our biology the stuff of fables. |
A maggot mass of 32 C
May not concern you or me.
But to see flies dine
On a drunken swine
Can earn you a Ph.D.
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ABLE members are a hard working bunch
Doing workshops interrupted by lunch.
Pretzels and sandwich and fruit,
And a cookie to boot.
By Friday lunch it loses its punch. |
Of ABLE I must declare
To me it’s a breath of fresh air.
The people are neat,
Their knowledge is sweet.
And of their students they all give great care.
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Bid adieu to President Budd.
Her gavel resounds with a thud.
Her smile gets much wider
As she says “Ask Bill Glider!”
You’re all now in the hands of that stud. |
Their luggage was lost in midair.
The Albertans had nothing to wear.
And so we did clad
In what clothes they had.
And will NEVER again fly U.Air.
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Our ABLE at VT’s been fine.
Good weather, good friends, and good wine.
Our labs all succeeded
Many had all that we needed.
Now Mary wants us to leave by nine. |
Our table would prefer to write a haiku
But found we had not a clue.
So then we tried a sonnet,
But hit a brick wall,
Darn it.
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Three cheers for the meetings of ABLE.
They give us labs fun and durable.
And when food is ready,
The rush is quite heady.
We clear every plate at the table. |
Mark from Hayden-McNeil
Has wonderful sales appeal.
But he really rocks
With guitar and white socks
But his dancing will close the deal.
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A great meeting we had at VT
With workshops and critters replete.
The talks were quite fun,
And the schedules well done.
Our deepest thanks go to Mary. |
In workshops we saw submarines,
Alfalfa and roses and beans.
Between fossils and bugs,
We gave black worms their drugs,
Grew mold and ran around in the trees.
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There once was an old bio teacher
Who ponders which fauna to feature
She went to VT,
And what did she see?
That blackworms are pulsating creatures. |
There once was a conference in Boston
That five ABLE people got lost in.
We often were told,
“It’s just down the road.”
Turns out we were really in Austin.
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Boston “Lost Souls” Reunion Photograph
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